Chris Dorris’ Blog

Clarity, Courage and Discipline
September 9, 2009, 6:55 am
Filed under: Creating Your Dream

This is a blog about freeing ourselves from the conditioning of our pasts that prevents us from manifesting the miraculous lives that we all want and to which we all have access.

There are three reasons that people don’t create the lives of their dreams. The reasons are that they lack CLARITY, COURAGE and DISCIPLINE. In this post I’ll address the first, Clarity. In the next post, I’ll address Courage, and in the third, Discipline.

The first reason people are not living the lives of their dreams is that they don’t have CLARITY. By that I mean people do not have an answer to the question, “How do I most profoundly wish to use my life?” Without such clarity, there can be no intent. Without intent, there is no action. And without action, there is no movement toward that dream. The origin of any journey is a desired destination. A vision. The vast majority of people lack such vision for their lives.

And why is that? It’s because of conditioned or programmed beliefs that we’ve inherited. Specifically, we have been programmed from a very early age to believe that what we want is not available to us, or at the very least will require enormous amounts of suffering, struggle or pain in order to achieve. We are programmed to believe that we don’t have the resources to attain our desires, and that we’d be better off being more practical and realistic and learning how to “make a living” than to invest in our ultimate dreams. We have been taught to survive as opposed to thrive.

Let’s do an experiment to illustrate this. Think of a number, a specific amount, that corresponds to the most money that you could ever imagine making under any circumstance – any circumstance – in one year. Write that number down on a piece of paper.
Now, answer this question: can you imagine, regardless of the number at which you arrived, doubling it? For instance, say you answered $150,000. Can you IMAGINE making $300,000 in one year? Or if you initially came up with $1M can you imagine $2M? Can you imagine winning the lottery and making $250M on any given Saturday drawing? Can you IMAGINE inventing something like google or a new children’s book or a new storm window or a new brand of clothing that takes off and makes you $1B in one year? Can you IMAGINE that? Of course you can. If you’re saying no, you’re not hearing my question. If you’re saying no, you’re answering the question, “Do you see HOW you could pull that off?” And that’s not the question I’m asking. If you were able to double the initial amount, you see the phenomenon I am pointing to here. It is highly probable that you altered, unconsciously, the question I posed, which had to do with imagination, into another question that had to do with what you’ve been taught to believe is possible for you. And you did that without knowing it. You did that because of your conditioning. This is an example of how we are slaves to our programming.

As we age, we grow more and more distant from clarity on our desires and we remain confined within the walls of our programmed beliefs of what’s available to us in this life. When we start to entertain the WHAT of our desires, we instantly get caught up in the HOW and spoil it. We can’t see HOW we’ll possibly pull of these miraculous desires and therefore we abandon them for something much safer and more practical, like a job. I’m not surprised by the fact that 84% of Americans reported in a Forbes survey disliking their jobs.

So we need to return to clarity. Clarity on how it is that we wish to use this miraculous and highly improbable event called life. We had such clarity as children – before we were well educated about our limitations. It is our nature to have such clarity. Since childhood, our nervous systems have become clogged with the limiting beliefs that govern our every move.

Here are two nervous system unclogging exercises that I ask each of my coaching clients to complete. By answering the first question with the creativity and freedom of a child, and answering the second with the sober recognition of our impermanence, you will begin the return journey to clarity. Here are the questions:

If you had your own personal genie, with infinite powers, and you have infinite wishes, for what are you asking?

What do you want to be able to say on your death bed about how you used your life?


16 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Nice, I definitely need some clarity in my life right now..

Comment by harish

I like your tain of thought Chris…it clears out the clutter and returns us to what is meaningful to us….

Comment by jaunie itsell

Clutter is such a good word to describe the result of the conditioning. One of the guides at a place called The Oneness University in India, Anandagiriji, describes it similarly as “clogging” of the nervous system.

Comment by chrisdorris

hey chris i really like your video. It’s very inspiring to me. I think it would really help me accomplish some of my goals in gymnastics 🙂

Comment by Kelci

You know it, Super Star! Hoping to see you very soon!

Comment by chrisdorris

This reminded me that on my deathbed I will realize that I will most likely look at many of the worries I have today as trivial. Back to the bigger picture…

Comment by Hans

You know, Hansy, I think ALL my worries are trivial. As Buddha said, “Worry is useless. If I worry, it doesn’t change anything. If I don’t worry it doesn’t change anything.” So what I’m changing is the frequency with which I choose worry as my response. Decreasing it, of course;)

Comment by chrisdorris

Hey Uncle Chris,
I really liked most of what you said (unfortunately I can’t really make any insightful comments like the others), but maybe when you’re done your triad thing, you might try writing about the doubts and discouragements you talked about.
For example, Benny is still the kind of person who’ll act without weighing out his decision versus his opportunity costs. Because of this, he’s knocked out several of his teeth, been apprehended by the local police, and caused himself lots of rief and disappointment that he could have easily avoided.
On the other hand, I very rarely make decisions without taking a few steps backward to assess the situation first. As a result, when my decisions lead me to regret, I can usually expect it or know exactly why because I took time to try to anticipate the repercussions of my actions.
I don’t know. Maybe it’s different for kids.
Just curious about what you’d think.

Comment by Maggy

I can’t believe you prefaced that by saying you can’t make an insightful comment! That was remarkably insightful, Maggy!

I often use that story of Benny in my talks and coaching as an example of how as children, we have yet to learn to paralyze ourselves from action with thoughts of what “could go wrong” or thoughts of the possibility of not getting what we want. That’s freedom. There’s a difference between being impulsive and being in a state of doubtlessness. But it’s a fine distinction. And I’m going to need to ponder it before I respond more. You bring up an awesome point, my brilliant neice!

Have a reminded you lately how much I love you and how proud I am of you?!

I use Benny as the example because he happened to be the child that crawled into the room that day and went for my keys.

Comment by chrisdorris

Amazing Chris…love all the videos and especially love your book! I’m still working on the “worry” thing. I think it comes from me wanting to control all things, who knows? I know worrying doesn’t change the outcome of the situation…but, still can’t overcome it.
Keep the videos coming!

Comment by Kim Bennett

Thanks, Kim. I’m thinking that the next post will be on Embracing Uncertainty. You certainly CAN overcome the practice of worrying. If you have the right tool(s) to do it. One of my favorite definitions of enlightenment is: Having a mind that is open to everything, and attached to nothing. So, when we can practice doing what needs to be done, and then not getting caught up in the outcome, or getting our way, then we are free. More on that in the next blog post!

Comment by chrisdorris

What great insight! Love how you threw in creative genius! Keep it going, CD!

Comment by Jason

Thanks, Bro J!

Comment by chrisdorris

I can’t believe my Fantasy Team is in last place..

Comment by Jared Zygowicz

I can’t believe the Eagles lost to the Raiders!

Comment by chrisdorris

Chris, I love your videos, especially this last one on uncertainty. We are there. I have really loved getting to know you through all your videos. We are sure on the same page about so much of our thinking.
It would be great to work with you.

Comment by Debbie Lumby

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